Just Another Day

Thinkin about stuff

2012-02-02T22:13:00.003-05:00

Sitting here tonight watching Taylor sleep on the couch I've realized, I worry too much, I stress about stuff out of my control, I try to be a perfectionist, and I don't laugh enough.
Seeing her after her being unwell for a week lay there so contently I realize life is good for her, she is content, the little things in life make her happy, she tries to please us far too much, and she is sorry often for things she has not control of.
Just thinking tonight has made me realize that I need to make room for more time with the one's I love, worry less about not working and change the things I can about the money I don't have and spend less cause I don't have it. I need to use more of what I have and not buy new stuff just because I think I need it, and I've realized that writing down these things that I am thinking about is making me realize more how important life is and not to not appreciate it.

Why am I thinking about all of this............I was on the phone with my father tonight, my mother got on the phone and again as usual stated the man on the phone wasn't my father, that she thinks he's my/our uncle. She couldn't remember his name, and wasn't sure why he wanted to know all her business. He's been in her life forever, and it's him she doesn't know. I can't imagine how he feels. His heart must hurt but he says he sometimes laughs and teases her. She kissed him goodnight and he asked why if she didn't know him was she kissing him. Her reply, I kiss all the men before I go to bed at night. You see she sees several people in the house, all with the same name, and all come to do jobs, none are her husband or when he is there he's not there for long and not often enough. He's there every day seven/twenty four, goes no where and is the only one there.

So why am I thinking about all I am. Because life is short, but not just short, life can so easily be forgotten, mental illness is cruel, it robs those who remember of so much and for those who are effected by it, it truly is sad. It hurts to see my mom's mental being the way it is, but it is the way it is. She sees things the way she does, and we know things the way they are. It hurts that she does not remember so much, so that is why today I've decided to--live life, laugh lots and love those who are in my life with all my heart, not that I don't already but to really make a conscious effort of doing it and not creating stress like I do because of worrying about everything so much. Today is today and tomorrow today may be forgotten. There are not guarantees that life will always be the same, it can change in a minute, make that minute count!!!

Thinking about stuff......

2012-01-29T00:32:00.004-05:00

Not so sure where my thoughts are with the health care system we have. Frustration is probably my number one enemy right now. Trying to figure things out, waiting for the doctors to decide what they are going to do, and then trying to figure out what my mother will agree to be involved with. One doctor says one thing, another says something else. Thinking it's time to take one day at a time and enjoy each day as it slowly happens.

Michael is doing all he can to do whatever he can. We went for our follow up about his injections for his tremors. The doctor is amazing there and has put us in again for an earlier appointment then the receptionist said was available. He has said straight out that the tremors will come back before the needles and that's already happening. I know it's upsetting him, and I would be lying if I said it didn't bother me too---my heart hurts for him when he is hurting. February can't come soon enough but like always we will wait and yup.....take one day at a time.

As a parent, child and mom I sometimes wish I could throw a temper tantrum. Don't you think it would be the ideal way to handle a problem???.....NOT, but it sure would make me feel better for a bit.

Anyway that's about it for now. Tomorrow is another day, and just like I've mentioned taking it slowly and with whatever is on our plates we will deal with as it comes. Each day is a new day, with new hurdles and new challenges. Each one will be taken on and dealt with, look out world, I won't have a temper tantrum just yet but well maybe one day and who knows where. I'll keep yah guessing....lol.

HaPpY NeW YeArS

2012-01-02T11:40:00.005-05:00

Haven't been here for a bit. Life has really gotten in the way. Thought I would update and sort of let yah know where things have been........... remember that diagnoses of Alzheimer's that my mom was given a way back a bit ago????? Well I argued it and would refused to believe it.

After an MRI that showed a tumor, non cancerous, on my mother's brain, our new family doctor, who I must say suggested I write down all my concerns and ask lots of questions, made an appointment for my mother to see a neurosurgeon. Well, I did, and he answered. I wasn't there for the appointment, as it was scheduled when I was working, and probably because of how I opposed the diagnoses they really weren't wanting me there. Well, the neurosurgeon asks questions, reads the note I sent, completes a few memory tests, and comes to the conclusion that YUP, I was right. She does not have Alzheimer's, he comments that she is far to smart and her ability to keep on track is not of that that someone would demonstrate with the disease.

As my father says when I asked him how he was feeling..........first sad, then upset then sad again....you see it's not the first time the medical profession has botched up. I won't even go into the number of times, but truly it would make your head swim. I have very little faith, no respect and absolutely no want to have something ever attempted to be fixed again if it really ain't broken.

So where do we go from here??? Apparently my mother was on medication that was far to strong with the amount being far to much, that was changed after a fast visit to our new family doctor. Apparently there is concern for the damage the strokes she has had have done. However, can you imagine the day before Christmas Eve, the doctor called who made more than one wrong diagnoses and put them all on paper in a letter to my parents, to see if my mother would agree to being in the hospital for a few days to have a complete review of her medications, and her health. First off, how sad that she felt the need to call, especially her timing, and on the phone would not even mention that she was wrong but that the neurosurgeon's report makes some recommendations, but she would love to have my mother in again to reassess. Oh I should mention she is a specialist in one medical area and totally suggested that my mother does not fit into this category.
My thoughts, the medical field is totally a guessing game, no one knows which side is up. That doctors refuse to admit error, and hide behind reassessments, and that most doctors think they are "God like", and only they not the specialists know what they are doing.

How do I feel??? A lot like how my father feels with a whole lot of anger in there. Where do we go??? We aren't sure. What will we do, we don't know. My mother wants nothing to do with the doctor who was wrong, she wants nothing to do with her or her place of work. We will have to make some decisions. Who knows where they will take us. I am truly hoping that 2012 is a whole lot different than 2011. Here's to whatever awaits around the corner. Keep us in your thoughts, and please always asks lots of questions and if you don't agree, don't give in, the health of a loved one might be jeopardized if you do.

I learned today......

2011-11-12T22:22:00.004-05:00

Early today I phoned my father to see if he needed to run any errands as I was heading over their way and would stop in if he was needing out of the house to do anything. As yesterday was Remembrance Day he was not able to get his banking done so today he took advantage of doing that and getting his hair cut. As usual of late my mom was laying in bed trying to catch her breath. Something she is out of lately quite quickly trying to do anything. Well we lay there we talked about all kinds of things. She is sure that there are many people working where she lives. That it is just not my father but many who do all the work about the "place". This place has been my parents home since long before I was born. As she talked, I interrupted which I do often no matter who is talking, it's just me and my bad habit, anyway, I took the opportunity to ask questions about what my mom actually does remember of her life. Sometimes things should be left alone, maybe then there wouldn't be upset and heartache on my part. Anyway, she was talking about the "man" that was there and left. That man being my father but her not remembering. Anyway, she talked and she said she knows people say he's her husband but she knows otherwise. So I asked, if he's your husband, does that mean I'm your daughter? and her reply was that of-well they tell me you are but I don't remember any of that part of my life. Did it hurt? Yes. Why did I ask? I'm not really sure, maybe I just thoughts she might say of course silly you are, but her response hurt, and later when I was alone it brought tears to my eyes. Imagine not knowing much of your life, not remembering your family, not understanding a huge part of your life. But when we talked she remembered her mother, her aunt and her grandmother, and she talked of them and how they played different roles in her life. I just don't get it, but I did learn that if I don't ask questions then I won't be hurt. Is that a good thing????

Something I just can't get my mind around.....

2011-11-08T08:48:00.004-05:00

It's funny how the brain works, one day you seem to understand what's going on around you and the next the world is a huge scary place.

Working in the profession I do, child care, I often feel so for the little ones brought into a place that is unknown to them, dropped off in some strangers arms and left for a day without an understanding of what really is going on around them.

Then along comes Alzheimer's disease into my life. Sort of like that first day of child care, there is that person you've known all your life, you call them mom and they look at you like you don't belong there. They don't know who you are, and they feel so lost and alone. My mom has no idea of so much of what has gone on in her life. She asks my father often to call her husband, she asks me to come into the back room and talk to her about the "man" in the house. She has no idea who he is and at night she is often afraid in bed because she has no idea who is laying next to her.

As I write this, I wonder if at some point my life will be the same, if I too will have this dreadful disease. It's strange how life can turn and twist and you really only be there doing whatever it is you are to do. We think we are in control of everything, that we know what we will do each day, that we plan and do what we feel is needing to be done. I laugh when I think of this, I don't plan things so much any more. I don't want to be disappointed or disappoint anyone. Planning use to give me something to look forward to, now if things don't happen like I think they should then my upset is great. So I take each day as it comes, look for the good in it and try to understand what is happening all about me.

My mother is a very intelligent woman, it sometimes terrifies me to know she feels so lost, so unaware of who's around her, so fearful. Just like that child dropped off in that place I call work, but to them is just a big building that mommy or daddy leave them in. How fearful it must be for them. Then I sit and think of how fearful it must be for my mom, her house is unrecognized, her husband isn't the person she thinks it should be, and I her daughter never existed. What must she think when she looks at my tears and see tears over what she doesn't remember. As I write this my heart is heavy and my tears are great. I miss my mom just like that child must miss their's when they are left at that place where someone is caring for them. I tell that little one their mom or dad will be back later, I just wish my mom would be back.

haven't posted for a bit..............

2011-10-20T10:18:00.004-05:00

not so sure why. Sometimes I think if I ignore life it will just go away.

I see the look in my mothers eyes. The confusion during conversations is difficult to figure out, she deserves an "A" for effort in not trying to upset anyone as she really does not know who we are, and does not let on, at times we are able to figure out her confusion by comments she makes, and at those times it brings tears to my eyes. My father and I have had several conversations, he is a hero in my books for all he is doing. I've always known how lucky I am to have him as my father but even today I learn so much from him and I am so proud of who he is and all he does. I do cry more than I think I ever have, and I know that crying only causes headaches, but it does help sometimes and if that's what I have to do to make myself feel a wee bit better than I'll shed tears when I have to and laugh when I can. Laughter really is the best medicine.

Taylor came home with a note yesterday, and right now my hubby is sitting at the computer emailing her teacher a letter. Her concerns are of Taylor's fidgeting in class. Wow, with all Taylor has going on in her life, I'd pleased if I were a teacher and this is how she is using her time to relieve her stresses. Often I learn from Taylor, however one thing I can't understand is how a teacher with knowledge of a child's issues in her life---and there are many, can actually focus on fidgeting and it's distraction for the class. When I hear all else that is going on in the class it just causes me to shake my head.
This is just one more thing that is put on that plate that is already piled high. Will we deal with it, yes, do we want assistance from the teacher, yes. Do we think Taylor needs to be disciplined by the teacher, NO, but that's not for us to say, it's her environment and all we can do it hope that Taylor comes to some sort of way of coping that fits into the teacher's little box of allowment-is that a word??? so that she is not disciplined again, and that one day soon she may have that desk back to use. Yup the teacher took her desk and turned it back around so that there is not the opportunity to put things into it. That is a priviledge and has to be earned. Taylor earned her desks once, but had it taken away when she wasn't sitting still, go figure.

It's a total walk in the dark

2011-10-02T21:49:00.003-05:00

never knowing who will be recognized, who will not be known and who will be the one to make my mom feel comforted is like taking a walk in the total dark and not knowing where you will end up or where you've been, you'll just know when you get there that it's suppose to be where you are. Does it make sense???? Not to me either. I look at pictures I've taken of my mom with Taylor or my dad, and in her eyes I see fear. Fear of not knowing who she is with, fear of not understanding what is going on about her. It's hard to explain, she puts on a real good front, she will remember my name when someone says it, she'll know who my father is when I call him dad, but does she really? My heart aches for her, my thoughts are always about how she is doing, and how her days are. Taking each day for what it's giving us is how we have to live life, but it really is like walking in the dark.... you know that really scared feeling you get, not seeing, not being able to get your barrings, just walking in almost total blindness, maybe every now and then touching that familiar object and thinking, I'm ok, I'll be alright. Is that what a person with Alzheimer's disease has go through their mind? Or are their days full of fear of the unknown..... When we talk my mom talks about not knowing or remembering parts of her life, or times of her life....she does not remember my father, she does not know who I am and she sometimes calls Taylor, Kim. She does seem to know Michael, he is her one constant, the person who can comfort her, the person who can make her laugh, and that's ok. At least we know she has someone that she recognizes, who knows why she doesn't remember us, but such is the way things are now. Each day is a new experience. I'll just keep taking that walk in the dark, because one day the light will go on and she will remember the one's she forgotten and if that day never happens then it's the memories we have of the past that we hold on to. Right???

YesTerDay....

2011-09-23T13:15:00.003-05:00

wasn't a good day. Today I set goals I wanted to achieve and guess what---everything I wanted to do got done!!! Not so sure if I've mentioned lately all that is on my plate--it actually is alot and I've come to realize that so far I've managed it all well. Not so sure how anyone else would manage, but I am wondering. Guess you could say, every now and then I have a down day, yesterday was really one of the first that I actually sat and wrote how down I really felt. The today I thought I'd better post what's on my plate so that people know I'm really not a Debbie Downer.

So where do I begin, well here goes.....
2009 hubby in serious auto accident, sustained head injury creating memory and cognitive issues as well as injury to spine

2009 daughter diagnosed Type 1 Diabetic - then one year later told her was not and to stop administering insulin--oh did I mention she was only nine at the time-there are still issues with her blood sugars and we are still no wiser as to what the matter is
2010 my mom was diagnosed with Alzheimer's, varied Dementia, and after several falls which the family doctor did nothing about, several injuries which impede activity

2011 myself three surgeries, one to fix the first two that were not done properly, and that further complications resulted from lack of doctors taking the time to do their jobs right

2011 daughter fell down stairs---held onto the rail, didn't let go and has torn all the muscles about and on the rotor cuff, surgery possible in the next few days/week, oh and she's now ten

add to that the stress of not working daily, the issues of common cold, flu and other nasty things that happen once school starts and well, now you totally see where I am coming from. There's a whole lot more thrown in there that is needing to be dealt with daily but I won't get into all the nittygritty, however yestersday was a bad day---today is better :)

All I need to remember is I do have friends, I have a wonderful husband, and my daughter is fantastic. These are the positive things that make my life good, and I am very thankful for.

the uPs and DoWnS

2011-09-22T22:00:00.003-05:00

One day is a good day, the next day is not so good. Why is it that the dance just can't always be level. Every time I think it's ok, things are good, and I let my guard down, life crashes. I try to always look to the positive, think there's a reason for everything and that I should learn from whatever it is that happens. Lately my frustration is high, my anger is rising and things just are not the way they should. Tomorrow will be better, then again who knows. Just walking through the grass with my feet always getting wet, gotta remember that if yah wear rubber boots, things would be different. Just like if you made different choices, things would be different. One day at a time, one step at a time, one hurdle at a time. Yup it can be done, I'll get through it, and get on. Today is just a not so good day, tomorrow will be better.

if it weren't so tragic it would be a comedy.....

2011-09-13T20:21:00.004-05:00

right now I'm not sure how I feel about alot of things. Firstly, it's rough I mean really rough dealing with the confusion I have about the stuff my family is going through. It's totally not ok for anyone to assume everyone knows what is going on and that if a joke is made that it is in fun not to be taken personally. I'll explain, today my father and I had a conversation about how he reacts to comments made by Michael, Taylor or I and that really sometimes his reactions are not fair. Example, tonight we are sitting there and my mom just finished opening her birthday gifts, my father had given her a bunch of scratch and wins and so Taylor and her were about to do them. My father was looking for something to scratch them with when he found a loonie and a toonie in his pocket. Innocently my hubby said, "awww give them a loonie for two loonies..........you could of cut the air with a knife, and if looks could of killed Michael would of been laying dead and about to be stuffed on the living room floor. I spoke up and said that this was exactly what I was talking about earlier today. I have had about enough, for him to only tell us that about fifty times a day my mothers asks him if she is going crazy.....did we know this???????It was a joke, any other family would of laughed, not us.... I wanted to leave, I wanted to throw his camera through the wall, and I wanted to shout WTF!!!!
But all I did was sit there, for the longest time with nothing by anyone being said....it was hard but I knew that I had better keep my mouth shut, and so I did. Why is it joking is taken so seriously, life is full of anger and frustration, and all that keeps happening is I'm getting shit for one thing or another that I either say or do????? However, what did I do???? I pulled up my big girl panties, and went about the rest of the night like nothing was wrong.........I truly believe before all of this is said and done, that slowly I will be growing crazy, no joke, total truth because if it weren't so sad and tragic what my mother is going through, and if I were on the outside looking in I just might be laughing at how funny things are when they happen. Take this for example.... my parents have been married for over fifty years, live in the same house and have owned the same car for over ten years. Yet tonight my mother walks out of the house, looks at the car and says.......in the st excited voice going....our car, my favourite car, you brought it back".....it hasn't been anywhere, isn't going anywhere, and she's seen it there forever, parked right where it was parked and has been forever. I almost laughed at the expression, the excitement and the joy she was displaying, but sadly she really doesn't remember it, or my father and half the time me.....yes we said, it's back...............................ok so who's confusing who now????? Go figure, just tell me where and when to do what, and what to say so that no one is upset, angered, or sad. On a happier note we actually got through four birthdays with my mother not throwing a hissy fit and suggesting she is going to cancel them.....it was just the opposite this year, we went to their place for dinner and a cake, then opened presents and off we came home, no drama. Tonight was so bazaar because out we went for dinner, and during dinner my father says, "we never sang you happy birthday," what does my father do.............suggest we sing it right there in the restaurant. So we did and my mother actually sat there like she was conducting a band, moving her arms about and suggesting we sing it louder, and know what--she actually had a smile on her face. Who's laughing now, maybe the joke is on us. Maybe that's all it is, a bad joke. I just don't see the comedy of it, then again I never really enjoyed a good comedy. Maybe it's me missing something, but until the next time, I'll just look at it is for how sad it is, and know that each day her memory is becoming worse, one day she may say something hurtful and maybe on that day I'll just have to laugh.

How confusing it must be???

2011-09-12T21:10:00.002-05:00

I really can't comprehend Alzheimer's at all. I can't imagine looking into the eyes of people you have known forever and not knowing them. I can't imagine being afraid of the people you have loved forever. I don't understand how my mother is able to tell someone she has it and then be totally confused about life. It really is not a most wonderful experience and it is an emotional roller coaster to be on daily.
I spent the afternoon with my mother, she could not remember how to cook a basic meal, she did not know where "they" keep things in the house. Only her and my father live in the house and have for over fifty years and she does not remember the house and believes she has just moved there. She says she is sometimes terrified with who she is sleeping with, and it is the same man who has been in bed beside her for the entire time they have been married.
I can't imagine how my father feels, telling her daily that he loves her, that he is there and has never left and that he will take care of her, only to have her forget it all and have to be told again and again. I know it takes it's toll on him, I know she worries about frustrating him, and yet each day is the same.
What is more cruel???
Have an illness invade your body and make you frail and weak, or to have a disease invade your mind and memory. I really can not say. Both Michael's parents passed away after having battled Cancer bravely. It's heartbreaking for everyone seeing the body change and the illness take over. Yet with Alzheimer's it's hard for the family, fearful for the person and heartbreaking for everyone.
I keep saying one day at a time, yet it's almost one minute at a time. The good with the not so good, and the sad with lots of tears being shed.
Hope for a rainbow and end up with a falling star to wish on. Maybe there will be a cure for all the terrible illness and diseases in life.

How is this affecting Taylor......

2011-08-11T21:32:00.003-05:00

Got to my parents house after work today. There I found Taylor explaining to my mom who she is. My mom was in tears and I knew my father was pretty choked up and there sat my ten year old explaining to my mom that it was ok and that she was her granddaughter. I stopped in my tracks, stood there and listened. Sometimes I wonder where that child gets her abilities. She is courageous beyond courageous, she has more passion in her baby finger than most do in the whole body, and she is so giving and loving that my heart bursts with pride when I see her interacting with others. I often wonder how the life we live affects her. We talk about everything, there is nothing that she does not know, being open is in our minds the only way to be. We share the good, the bad, the happy and the sad. She never seems to be bothered by the little things, and she always has a smile on her face. She's my role model in so many ways and she is only ten. Somethings happen for reason, maybe we are to learn and grow. Maybe we are to see and make changes in our lives that will affect others as we grow and learn. However things are affecting her she seems to always be on top of the world. In my heart I know that, I just need to make myself believe it more. She's one amazing little girl, and I truly am thankful she is in my life.

Take each day as a new one...

2011-08-03T12:58:00.002-05:00

things happen, life goes on and each day is a new day. Trying to believe that--really I am. Last night my mother, father and I had the most amazing phone conversation, in the end when we were talking the subject came up about who people were. I try to avoid that with my mother, sometimes she knows and other times it's just not there. Well, last night I thought for sure she knew it was her daughter on the phone, she started talking about some bbq she had been to long ago and it came about she thought she was talking to one of my aunts. It must be so hard not knowing who people are in your life, she hardly recognizes my father, and I know it's hard on him, but each day is a new day. The same questions are asked of him a thousand times and for five minutes he has her understanding then she forgets again. Why is this disease so cruel? But, like I said take each day as a new day, move forward or backwards with it, and take the good and the not so good. Tonight I am heading there for supper, I look forward to it, but know that at some point my heart will hurt for my mother's lack of remembering, it's tough, I know I am not the only one that is going through this walk with it, so I take one step forward two back, it's like a dance, one that has no music but one that is being led and I will follow.

A good day....

2011-07-28T20:45:00.003-05:00

Today was a good day....we talked on the phone, Michael and Taylor both got on the phone and my father and mother were on the other end. For the most we were able to keep the in the present. Alot of the conversation was hard for my mother to keep up with, we tried to simplify most of the conversation but often my mother would refer to things that were on her mind.
Most conversations of late, I have been hanging up with tears in my eyes, spending the next longest while crying wishing that our lives were different. Today we laughed, giggled and when we hung up it was with hugs and words love=love you shared. One day at a time, baby steps, remember the good, work through the sad. How unfair, but manageable.
I really am trying not to be selfish. I wish my mother were without this dreadful disease, but it's what we are dealing with and we will get through it together.

My Walk with Alzheimier's

2011-07-24T20:04:00.004-05:00

It wasn't long ago my father told me to spend time and enjoy the time with my mother as his fear was she just might not wake up one day being herself. That was probably the best warning anyone could have given anyone when it comes to this dreadful disease. It seems like it was just yesterday that he told me that, and it seems like just yesterday without notice that she did just that, she woke up not knowing or understanding many things in this life of ours.
I was there for my hubby when both his mother and father passed away with the dreadful disease cancer. There were many nights and days of crying as we watched this disease ravage their bodies, however their minds were sound until the very end.
I'm not understanding anything at all about Alzheimer's disease and maybe I am not wanting to. I tend to think I am in denial, healthy or not I'm hoping that maybe one day soon my mother will know who I am and stop asking my father who he is. My father is very patient and is doing all he can to assure her things are safe, and no different than before. But before what????
She insists she is not my mother, that she never had a child. When she first told me that she wasn't my mother I was hurt, then laughed, and now just plan and simply am angry by the whole unkind understanding she has, and it's not her fault, not at all but it's a circumstance and that I just have to accept it.
Tonight I got off the phone after I called over there, totally believing that my fairy tale world is kind and safe, until I call over there and then reality sets in. Tonight she insists she is being held captive, that she wants to call her father, whom has been dead for as long as I have been alive. She was speaking loudly in the background saying she wants to go home. That the house she is in is not her home. Only for me to tell her she is home and that she has lived there for over fifty years. I can't change her belief but I can change the subject and I do try to do that.
I plan on using my blog as my place to write my thoughts, share my experiences, and just make notes of how this new walk in life with Alzheimer's is affecting my/our lives. Maybe it will be a place for those who have also been affected by it to share, I know I am not walking this path alone, I know many others have had much worse affect their lives, but this is my blog and my place to share.

2011-07-07T20:36:00.001-05:00

Okay so I went back to work. Thinking all would be fine, wow was I wrong. Three weeks ago it simply started as a cold, you know the whole head thing. Then it went into my ears, nose and throat. Now I'm on another antibotic with it nicely moving down into my chest. So needles to say there's not been much I've been doing, other than trying to get well.
Night time is the worse, coughing jag and the like, not fun at all. Once things are better I'll be back.

2011-06-19T22:03:00.000-05:00

Had an amazing day with my family--Happy Daddy's day to Taylor's daddy and Happy Father's Day to my wonderful Father--although Alzheimer's is clouding my mother's mind......we are living each day as it happens, taking each step as we walk, and dealing with all the trials that it sends our way---but love will prevail!!!!

2011-06-17T21:58:00.000-05:00

recently my father reached out for some help
against our doctors wishes saying my mothers memory issues are all medicine related
we felt differently
and my father asked for a referral to the Alzheimer's Clinic for an assessment to be done
this is a three week process of several hours a week with doctors and specialists who review your life
my father took my mother
and this week
we were told she does have this
our world has been extremely altered, even just this week my mother seems to have spiraled downward more and faster than we ever would of expected
add this to a whole lot of other stuff on my plate and
stress is a minor statement in my life

however
the other night
my father asked me to make a book of some sort that we could put words in that would make my mother's remembering things easier

I made that book the other night
took it over yesterday
and
I was told my mother looked at that book more than 100x yesterday
but my father is unsure she even remembers sometimes who the pictures are of
they are labeled, words and sentences are put such as---my name is...my husband's name is....my daughter's name is.....my address is........

I do not know alot about this disease
I have read alot
and in truth it baffles me

I'd have to say the hardest thing I've ever created was this book
just because it had to be made simple
but the reasoning for it although helpful
broke my heart and does with all this disease has brought into our lives

thanks for letting me share
hoping your reasons for scrapping are always happy ones
but
I do know we scrap when we are creating memories and sometimes this is of people or even pets we have loved and lost
if you can share your experiences
believe it or not
it really does help the heart with the load when sharing with friends

2011-06-16T19:25:00.001-05:00

Check out my other blog.....I've been scrapping a bit and thought I would create a blog just for my creations.
sharingmyscrappingcreations
Thanks for looking

Finally Scrapped Again

2011-06-08T22:31:00.002-05:00

It's been a bit but finally I finished a page, the inspiration was the challenge over at My Scraps and More. They are hosting a My Scraps Got Talent Contest and finally I have drummed up the courage to participate. It's the process not the product and so far it's been fun. Hop on over to my Scrap Blog and take a look, or hop on over to myscrapsandmoreMy Scraps Got Talent and join in on the fun.

That weekend again....

2011-06-04T12:37:00.002-05:00

It's that weekend again when I'm up at four and out the door to get Taylor to her karate camp at the University of Toronto.
She's there all day and it's a full day of tiring activities, starting before breakfast with a run. She's totally psyched for this and loves going. She hangs out with two boys at karate weekly and they too are at the camp today. Tomorrow she is going solo, although she knows everyone there she won't have her two buddies there for comfort.
I was so proud of her last night, the Sensi tested her for a stripe on her belt, he actually tested her outside with her shoes on for a challenge, and it was a challenge as she has a broken taped baby toe, but she got her stripe. She's doing so well, and loving the fact that she's peer teaching. That part she really enjoys and it has given her confidence and respect for anyone in a teaching position. She sees now what it is like for someone to not listen to instruction. I really believe it's made and impact on her and her listening for the most. Then again I have to remember she is only ten.

Getting there.....

2011-05-30T22:49:00.002-05:00

Trying to get organized for me is like running my finger nails down the chalk board. I know it's annoying to do but once it's done it's over with.
So....
offically I can say I've created a blog for my scrappy creations. Am I creating lots, no but at least I have a place for them to be uploaded to. This blog is for my venting, I'll update here every now and then, but my goal is to create more and share.

A total vent just to get things off my chest

2011-05-03T20:57:00.003-05:00

Today started just like any other day, Taylor was up, breakfast was had and off I drove her to school. Home again, crashed for a bit then up and off to what should of been a simple pre-op appointment at the hospital for surgery for Friday.

Nope, not so, nothing is simple in my world, EVER.

Got there on time, in we went and met with the the doctor who would over see the procedure and put me to sleep. Well, in he comes, listens to me explain my undiagnosed bleeding disorder that has made my life miserable, and says....he's needing to speak to my hematologist. Should be simple, right???

Nope, not so, nothing is simple in my world, EVER.

Out he goes after a nurse has made the call, we hear the conversation, it's hot and heated in the end. The doctor that called is to put it mildly, pissed. There we sit, waiting for him to come back into the room. Guess he needed to cool down, it's a few minutes later and back he comes. He suggests he's going to speak to the doctor who is doing the surgery. Off he goes. A few minutes later he comes back, and you call tell he's still ruffled under the collar. He calls me back into the room, and mentions he's keeping his fingers crossed the doctor doing the surgery can get information from the hematologist. That as it stands at this point the surgery might, yup might, be a go, but if not would be in my best interest as they need to administer DDAVP and that the hematologist is not providing the information they need nor does he have time to see me. I'm trying to keep my cool in all of this, if I should type out what happened that last surgery regarding the administration of this it would make your temper flair, little own mine. I'm just ticked by now and hoping that his fingers crossed are enough to have the surgery take place. What next???

Off we go to my parents for dinner. It's been difficult lately with my mom forgetting who I am and the hurt that that involves. When we arrive today my father calls me out into the kitchen to talk. He mentions he's made an appointment for him and mom my at the local hospital for her to be assessed to see if she has Alzheimer's. All I will say is I'm not coping well, I started to cry there and tonight again broke down. I'm able to talk to Taylor about it. Telling her that nana is having difficulty remembering things. That mommy is having a hard time accepting this, that acceptance is a part of dealing with a problem and right now I am trying to work things out but just not able to get my emotions about things.

Everyone keeps telling us to write that book, I think if I did I'd need more support for depression, because it would bring back a whole lot of things we've dealt with over the last three years. Wow, they say things are suppose to make you stronger, and that things happen for a reason. I try to find the positive, I think for the most I manage to find the silver lining. But today, it's been a day full of rain and grey skies, hopefully soon the sun will shine and with that my mood will be uplifted because right about now, I need that silver lining at the end of the rainbow to make me feel better. Thanks for reading if you have read this this far.

It helps me to write things out, it makes a problem seem a little less when I read it again and again. Maybe it's a good thing, maybe it's not but it's my place to vent and it's just a way to get things off my chest.

Rain, Rain go away

2011-04-13T11:20:00.002-05:00

Who's likes rain??????

Guess I'm not alone--I love it!!!!!

I could sit on a porch at the lake and watch and listen to a storm go on about me. I'd find it very relaxing and enjoyable. However, I don't own a cottage and we really don't have an enclosed porch on our home, so the possibility of that happening is nil. However, I do love to sit and listen when it rains, and one thing for sure, when it rains it pours. In more ways than one.

This last little bit I've sat and thought about all the things that have gone on over the last two years in our lives.
At times it's very overwhelming, and I have to shake my head to find out if it's real or not.
Life isn't about not learning, it's about taking every small little experience and finding something in it to teach us a lesson.
Taylor often teaches me. Not to long ago she was in an activity that required her to compete against others. Don't get me wrong, I grew up in sports. Loved them all my life, until I stopped and watched, and realized that the unsportsmen like conduct was something I just didn't want to subject her to if I could help it. She's busy, we spend lots of time at the gym but her love of karate and swimming is where she is at now for activity. Anyway, back to my lesson, she was competing, didn't do well, actually came last, and her first comment was, with her arms in the air.......I won last place. Ok, did she actually win last place??--Yah she did. No one else finished it with her, there was no tie, she came last, the end, no one else was behind her, so know what???? She did win last place. Was it so bad? No. Was she upset??? No, she won that place. She finished, she did what she set out to do, and she won last place. That day, I learned from a child, winning really isn't everything, when it rain it does pour but it's not always bad. It really is about how you see it, how you take a situation and make of it what you may. Was I proud of her, sure I was. In my heart when she crossed that finish line I couldn't of been prouder, would I of loved to of seen her win? Of course, I would be lying if I said NO, but I learned, that smile on her face was more valuable than any first place ribbon, she was successful, and YUP, she won last place!!!

So when it rains do yah want the rain to go away??? Yah we all do, but take that rain and dance it in, enjoy it cause yah never know when it might rain again.

They say if it doesn't kill yah.........

2011-03-03T22:12:00.002-05:00

it will make yah stronger.
Last year was a year to remember........stuff happening, things going on, and well, just when you hope that year is over and a good one will start. Guess what? It doesn't.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to be negative, but this year sure hasn't started out any better than last year ended.

Often I sit and wonder how come things just keep being thrown at us. Are we suppose to be learning something, are we suppose to be getting stronger????
Maybe.
But I really wish we could catch a break somehow. All I'm saying is that if being stronger is what we are suppose to be, soon I will be super woman. Hey now that won't be such a bad thing, the body that she had I'd welcome.......and with that said, I've stuck to my fitness site, I'm eating better, loosing weight, and after I get the ok to start exercising at the eight week mark after surgery I will be right back at the gym walking that track.

I keep saying I'm going to get back into scrapping, I've been working on my scrap space for what seems like forever. I make progress in the organizing and cleaning, and then I have something come about and it looks like the area was hit by a tidal wave. Only I could have such luck, but I am getting there and I will get back into creating soon. If yah've hung about this long waiting for a creation why not hang about a bit more------soon I keep telling myself.

The First Step Is the Hardest....

2011-02-01T22:15:00.005-05:00

A few years ago my husband gave me a IPOD with those words engraved on the back of it. The words were meant as encouragement. It's taken me a long time to take those steps, but after a life altering experience last week I have given up the only addiction I have and that's drinking coke. I've joined a wonderful fitness community, and I've started exercising. I have needed to make these changes for a long time, and with what has happened and in light of the fact that I am still here today for some unknown reason, then it's my chance to change and take those steps and do what's needed to be done.
I have a wonderful friend who's encouraging me, a fabulous hubby who's right there offering positive support and encouragement and a fantastic daughter who'll let me know how much she loves me at just the right time. Who can go wrong with all that support.
I've already started an exercise program, and the food monitoring is being done all by the fitness site I have joined. It's as easy as 123 and believe you/me I've needed that; fitness site for dummies, to help me as I'm not good at tracking what I've ate and this site makes it super easy.
I've taken the first steps, they were the hardest, now it's just a matter of being motivated and doing what I know needs to be done.
One day at a time, and one step at a time.

HoLy cOw BatMaN........

2011-01-20T22:42:00.004-05:00

can you believe it's already half way through January. Where does time go??? If I could buy one thing I think it would be time I would want to buy. I'm asking yah, how do you find time to create creatively, cook, take care of the family, work, and find some time to rest in there too????? If you've found the secret let me know because seriously I am really tired trying to find a way to balance everything.

The dog has a serious fear issue. I cook and she is terrified to be in the house on the main floor. She associates my cooking with the fire alarm going off. She's a bundle of nerves which stresses me out. Taylor is non stop go, and non stop talk. Sometimes all I want is a few moments of silence, and that's not happening too soon. Ever wanted a bird that talks???? I did until we got one.....LOL. Coslty, hubby's bird loves to whistle, talk and well, just add his laugh into anywhere he can during the day. He always puts a smile on my face, well not always. He's screaming for hubby is enough to make your skin crawl but he truly is a little love when he's in the mood to cuddle or snuggle.

Just before Christmas, on my way to work there was a poor little bird laying in the middle of the road. Well, I couldn't just drive by and leave him there, Christopher now resides in the basement and is there for 90 days, away from the other birds just in case his health is not the greatest. Now talking about birds and health, that little love bird, the one that draws blood has laid five eggs. She's sitting on them, protecting them, and rarely up for anything other than a bit of food and water. After eating the first few eggs, and then not sitting on the next batch she just might have things figured out, and we might just have some little wings flapping about here.

Hubby is NOT doing good at all. His pain is extreme, his ability to walk is minimal, and he still really tries to do for Taylor. Weekends might find him at the gym watching Taylor either swim or do her karate, but once the time is done there his body is wore out and he's in bed crashed for a few days recouping. He's my pillar and he doesn't even realize how much of a man he is to me.... I always say he does more than most able bodied fathers, but he doesn't think so.

Wow Christmas, now that seems like forever ago.....and shush don't tell anyone but I still have my tree up....... yup that thing called time, and here I sit mucking about on the computer when I could be doing so much more......but one thing I did find time for is walking the track at the gym when Taylor is there doing her thing....and I'm liking it....................go figure, it use to be the only place I could go and sit and watch tv, but now I've found I am really liking to walk so we'll see how long this lasts for...............anyway
speaking of time..............it's time to head to bed......................yah that's another thing I'm having a hard time finding time for.....first I'm tired all day then when my head hits the pillow I lay there and can't sleep.......PLEASE if you have any secrets, thoughts or know how on how to make time for just doing everything that needs to be done please please please let me know.....hugs.

And oh yah...................thanks for finding the time to visit my log and leave a comment, your words really do mean alot.
hugs

Trying to keep life in order...........

2010-11-13T18:54:00.005-05:00

Let's see where do I start....
my computer is totally down, and if I can get on hubby's it's late and I'm exhausted so I'm only on for a quick bit.

Hubby is no better, in fact some of the diagnoses coming in are down right scary. Often I hope the nightmare will end and we will all wake up and be happily ever after.

With some undue circumstances I'm no longer designing a newsletter and doing PR work for a scrapbook site, that hurts cause I was really enjoying doing this but well, maybe one day for a site that is in need.

The Hospital For Sick Kids isn't sure Taylor is a diabetic so we are testing her blood and heading there in a bit for a few more tests. I'm truly keeping my fingers crossed they are right as that would be the best Christmas gift ever. Who needs store bought toys and games, not having to take your blood daily and worry about how things make yah feel would be a gift for sure that would be cherished always. She has not been on her insulin for a bit and well her blood sugars have taken to reading under five, so we will see in just a bit where things will take us.

Scrapping has been on the back burner with a fresh start in the near future. Sooner or later I'll get things organized and ready for me to be creating galore. Get ready it's a goal for the new year.

As for everything else in life, it's as normal as it can be. Taylor actually was the Master of Ceremony of the Remembrance Day Service at her school. She stood, welcomed everyone, read a poem with another boy in her class, introduced the different presentations and thanked everyone for coming. I sure was one proud mom that day, way to go Taylor you have more gumption then I do or ever will.....
and.....
we've been spending a lot more time at home with our fur and feathered babies. It's amazing how having a pet/s really keep you grounded. The birds are amazing company and Tika the four legged mutt adds fun and frustration to our routine daily.

Life has been anything but boring, but with each other and together we will get through anything and everything. If you've read this far and aren't bored still, stay turned I hope to be back soon for more of life's happenings.

More confusion

2010-10-19T20:55:00.001-05:00

Just when you think you have it figured out life throws yah another curve ball. We were back up to Sick Kids today to hopefully of found out either yah or neigh to diabetes for Taylor. Still no answer just more testing and more confusion. Oh yah and my internet is out on my computer so my internet activity for now is all on my blackberry. I keep telling Calgon to take me away but I think it has selective listening too!!!

2010-09-07T21:51:00.000-05:00

Some know some don't and it's not secret. Almost twenty months ago my hubby was in a car accident that has changed our lives. He will probably never work again, his injuries are extensive, and his pain is intense, but he still does more than most able body people do for our daughter and myself. He is there for her when she needs a hug, he encourages me to do all that I enjoy and he spends time with both of us just doing us stuff. Thanks hubby for all you do, and thanks for being the man I love more and more each day. Hope your birthday was extra special, sorry I couldn't afford that Porche but wasn't the tour of it today great.....hugs.... and Happy Birthday!!!!!

2010-09-06T20:52:00.002-05:00

Was the night before school starting , and all though the house, you could hear the excitement that would scare a poor mouse-anyway yah get the picture
Taylor's excited, she's all ready and in bed - but I doubt sleeping--she's funny and just said--dramatic moment here--don't get me wrong I am nervous although I haven't been showing it--I smiled tucked her in and said night night

Now she has me stressed

anyway hope this year is full of wonderful memories for her - she is off to a new school and new adventures...tomorrow daddy and mommy will take her to school, and as she leaves us behind and the door closes for her new day......I'll be silently thinking about how and wow === she's in grade five already-time really does fly-not so sure I like how fast it's going
anyway==gonna take lots of pics to share and scrap
hugs

Not even sure what time it is

2010-09-04T23:02:00.002-05:00

just saying hey
life has been busy here
not that it isn't everywhere else too
but well
one medical thing after another
just hopped on to say hello
and hope everyone is doing well

listen to me
like so many read my blog
anyway
hope this finds everyone doing well who reads my nonsense
hope you are enjoying the last few days of summer before school starts
believe it or not
I'm not looking forward to school starting
not wanting to wake up earlier and get Taylor three towns over to where she has to go
lately if I could I'd stay in bed all day
oh well
life
gotta pick up my big girl panties and do what I gotta do
cioa

ThInGs AnD StuFf

2010-08-17T21:30:00.004-05:00

It's been a bit since I've been about my blog, life sometimes has a way of getting in the way here, it's never boring, sometimes stressful, but always interesting.

I wanted to thank all my friends who wished me a Happy Birthday on Facebook. This
year my birthday was a wee bit different than any other. My mother underwent a heart procedure, she's been ill most of my life, and doctors in our little hick town never seem to have an answer to the issues she has been dealing with. Off she went to a hospital not too far away and found the most amazing heart specialist who took interest in her and well, I'm keeping my fingers crossed that this procedure has changed her life for the better.
My birthday wish was for this and well, half way through the procedure she said she could breath, something that has not been easy for her for the last two year.

I wanted to share some fun and interesting things, and with life here not always leaving me in the mood to scrap, I've taken a new avenue of adventure, and thanks to Judy and Simply Scrapping Crafts www.simplyscrapping,ning.com I've joined her and her team as a PR person. So far I've had fun creating a newsletter for August and well, who knows where this adventure will take me but I'm excited to be part of an amazing team and can't wait to get to know the amazinng DT members there.

With August almost over, and school just about upon us, Taylor's a wee bit nervous about a change of school's, a new start. The school she was attending has closed it doors, it was orginally built in the 1800s and the Board of Education felt that the costs of renovations out weighed the benifits of keeping the school's doors open. Taylor is nervous, and with all of our life's happenings we're taking one day at a time and working things through. Her biggest worry is that the amazing secretary at the old school was always there if her blood sugars were off. I'm sure all will be alright but it is a worry for a nine year old working her way through this new diagnoses of diabetes.

Just wanted to let everyone now what's been happening here, hubby is still NOT doing well at all, but baby steps and one day at a time. There have been some scary diagnoses that have come about since the car accident. Our lives have changed forever, but we will survive. We've realized alot about live, and have come to really appreicate all that we have in our small family that helps keep us motivated to do all we can for each other.

No matter where life finds you, always look up, smile when you can, and take each problem as a lesson and learn from it whatever you can to make your worries simple and your life as stressfree as it can be.

Hoky Smoky July what already????

2010-07-28T20:58:00.003-05:00

wow is all I can say
it's been a month of lots happening, I haven't scrapped for a bit but did manage to sneak in time for a digi layout featuring one of Dawn Inskips kits. Thanks for looking, I'm working on taking my scrapping adventure on a new path, when I can share I will. Gotta say my new little dude loves being the topic of my photos.

here he is with a few ruffled feathers---he's got tude!!!

Happy Canada Day

2010-07-01T21:15:00.002-05:00

Hope everyone had a great Canada Day however you were able to spend it. We headed down to the lake later in the afternoon today to see what all was happening. I give hubby total credit for his pain was intense, but he went, walked and shared some fries at the beach. Here's a picture I caught of Taylor when she wasn't looking. She'd be outside twenty four seven if she could and when she's outside she's always able to find a way to play hard and relax, here she's chilaxing.

It truly is upsetting

2010-06-26T23:33:00.003-05:00

I've sat and watched and listened to the news tonight on the G20 and the happenings in Toronto. I'd like to say Toronto is my city, but after today I have a feeling it will be a long time before I am happy to say I am happy that this event the G20 happened here. Police crusiers have been set ablaze, people have distroyed store fronts, and all in the name of what??? Violence!!!!! They wear black, they hide behind their garb, and they say they are there to protest. Watching tonight all I can see is that they have created havoc, harm, and upset. Will Toronto ever rid of the happenings of today as anything but a true waste of money with all the distroying and damages that have happened. Wake up people. Protests happen daily in Toronto, nothing like what has happened today. People carried bats, people walked with intentions to harm, this is truly sad!!!!! They have been caught on tape, those people who have been involved in actions of criminal acts should and will be arrested. How sad is it our communities are having to take cover, go into lockdown and hope for their safety. Sitting and watching it is like watching a bad movie, but it's not, it's reality of something really happening. How it hurts me to think of the police that have been assulted, hit with rocks, spat at, and bottles of urine thrown at them. It is sad to see young adults behaving in this regard. I truly hope that when my daughter is older she will NEVER behave like I have seen tonight. We can give our children wings, I hope they/she will choose to fly differently and make better choices for the world we live in!

Had to share what I've been up to

2010-06-09T21:13:00.002-05:00

The most amazing little creature has come into my life. He's only four months old, but he's captured my heart and I think Taylor's too. His name is Leon, named by Taylor, and he's a cute little green Lennie. He's the cutest little bird I've ever seen, a cross between in my thoughts a parrot and a duck. His personality is sweet and playful but he definately has an attitude when needed. I'll post pics soon, but just wanted to let yah know that I've moved on from events that have happend in the past and well, I've got alot going on as usual with Taylor and hubby, but each day is a new day, and we are taking baby steps along the way enjoying the adventure with some new feathered little friends that have added sunshine and happiness to our hearts.

Haven't been about........

2010-05-08T20:51:00.002-05:00

I truly thought last year was a year full of life lessons. This year is turning out already to be a year full of lessons that I'd rather not relive any time too soon. Thought I'd let yah know where I've been and why I've been away. About four weeks ago a friend, well someone I thought was a friend started a discussion at the gym, actually in Taylor's karate class. The conversation got a bit aggressive on her part and oh let's say about five times I asked her to end the conversation. She wasn't pleased, and got physical, me I'm maybe a little well let's just say, naive and after she got physical, think I was in shock, and more verbally aggressive I got up and left. She started on the woman next to me who she hardly knew but continued the conversation and continued being aggressive with her. When I walked Taylor has seen what had happened and she waited for a bit and came running out to see if I was ok. I was and told her to go back to class. Next day friend one-who was the issue of the trouble and so called friend two, got together, talked and talked some more. Now here is where I become even more naive. You see to me if I were friend two I would say politely that I was not going to get involved and leave it at that, I would suggest the problem didn't involve me and say that friend one and me needed to work things out. NOPE, didn't happen but a day later both facebooked me, now here is where I think it's gets highschoolish. (Is that a word?) Anyway, I phoned friend two, she says to me she's not getting involved, but continues to tell me that she's given the other advice, well this has my back up especially since her and I have been friends, almost family for eight years. Well this isn't the first time that there has been issues, just happens to be the last. I have told both I am done, that I am not going to be playing games anymore, oh yah I forgot to add that friend two comments during our conversation when were were talking when I asked her a question, that sometimes you have to lie to friends not to hurt their feelings. Well done, the friendship has ended and I have been having a real hard time with it.
Emotionally I know it's the right thing to do, I've been telling Taylor for a long time now that bullying is not acceptable and to walk away from those that have to feel superior by bullying others. But wow does it ever hurt sometimes having to swallow your own medicine. Life's lessons are sometimes hard to accept but something to learn and grow from. It's hard at times as I see the individuals still at the gym, I have decided to go my own way, only because both got verbal when I told them I was done, and took things to a new level by then becoming verbally aggressive, but what is someone to do, I simply thanked them for respecting me and walked away. I'm trying to hold my head high-but it's been an emotional roller coaster with everything else on my plate. One step at a time, baby steps, and well, now yah know why I haven't been about, thanks for understanding and hey why not take a minute to tell me your definition of friendship, I'm still trying to figure it out.

Gone with the birds.........

2010-04-22T21:37:00.005-05:00

Ok so have I ever told yah that deep down inside I'm an animal lover. Our home isn't a home without feathered, finned and four legged friends. A bit ago we lost our cute little budgie, Sunshine. Well I went on a quest to find a little feathered friend that would be a wonderful addition to our family. In comes Diamond and Peach, two lovebirds. Technically I only wanted one but the breeder wouldn't separate the two so we ended up with both. Quickly Peach became daddy's and Diamond became Taylor's. Mommy felt that she needed something to love so again I hit kijji and found my little snuggler, Leon, a little Lennie that found his way straight to my heart. He's my snuggler and little lover that when once in my hands quickly finds his way up to my neck to snuggle in and lay quietly. Well with Peach and Diamond being inseperable each time daddy or Taylor had them out they would call for each other, usually leaving daddy without a bird to love. So, what's a mommy to do, but find daddy a bird. Well in comes Costly, yup daddy named him just because of the money that goes into setting up their little condos, and making them happy. Well, daddy isn't complaining about any of this cause Costly has sure found his way to daddy's heart. Nightly you will find them together and when Costly needs to head to his cage for bed, you will find him hissing like a cat at daddy, yup he grew up with cats---he's only a few months old but hisses like the cats he lived with, whistles, and is slowly learning words in his new home. So with all that being said--we've truly gone with the birds, and all I can say is that they sure have added a whole new meaning to fine feathered friends in our home.

Wanna join a kewl scrapping site??????

2010-04-15T21:41:00.003-05:00

Here's a new community for scrappers.
www.simplyscrapping.ning.com
It's growing quickly and the latest contest is helping them hit 1000 members. Wanna help me out??? Join the community and tell them I sent you there, I just might be a neat prize and I'll share. When you register be sure to tell them I sent you, put your name in the box where it asks who sent yah. Thanks and once you join you'll be glad you did, there are free copic classes and a whole lot more.

UpSide dOwN and WhAteVer

2010-04-05T21:41:00.004-05:00

What a weekend.......
Taylor had her first sleepover, it was a great night=starting with dinner out and then off to a movie--didn't expect The Last Song to be what it was about==take lots of kleenex if you plan on seeing it. Then home, the girls were amazingly well behaved, so well behaved that daddy has absolutely no problems with it happening again soon. Next day, Saturday, swimming, lunch, karate--and yes my baby got her next belt, and then home. Long night, but it started out great, we decorated eggs, and took lots of pics, had fun creating a table centre piece, took the birds out, and our amazing little budgie that has never wanted out, wanted to come visit with everyone else. Out she came, and when I went to put her back in her cage, she fell to the floor. Mike tried to revive her, but was unsuccessful. My heart ached, Taylor thought it was her fault, she was the last one holding her feathered little friend. We cried, talked about it not being her fault and that thankfully we were with her and she was not alone. Well the kitchen felt empty, twice I went to the cage to talk to my feathered little friend and Taylor summed it up by saying the kitchen wasn't complete with our little friend gone. What does mommy do???? Onto the computer, a night and morning spent looking for a new friend and what do I find but the cutest little baby Lennie - a small parrot, and believe it or not the breeder let us pick him up yesterday. He's our newest little addition and he's a sweetheart. He loves to snuggle, he's eating from our hands and loves his fruits and veggies. What an emotional weekend it's been, Taylor knows you can't replace a pet with a new one but you can find a new litle creature to love and care for. Thanks for reading if you've read this far, each week we seem to be on an emotional rollercoaster, but we'll make it, if it doesn't kill us it will make us stronger, we just keep hanging on sometimes upside down but whatever we will make it.

My baby tested again......

2010-03-29T21:30:00.002-05:00

on the weekend for another karate belt. If she is successful this will be her fifth belt. Where she goes for her karate her belt ranking is different than most other places. She started with her white belt and had to accumulate three stripes, after that it was her purple striped followed by her purple solid, she now has her yellow striped and has just tested for her yellow solid. Each belt when it's solid the student has to achieve three stripes before they can test for the next belt. At first it was all about learning, now she is teaching other new students and loving it. She is so disciplined and focuses so on her techniques. Mommy and daddy are so proud of her. Her goal is to get her black belt and with her determination she will. We were so worried of her not being in a school where she was learning French, heck she is learning Japanese and is doing quite well with it. Wow, give them wings and they will fly.
I'll let yah know next weekend as soon as we find out if she was successful.

A week of bedrest, copic credit and a picture I love of Taylor

2010-03-25T21:54:00.008-05:00

After a surgery last week that I thought would have me up and back to work after a few days, I'm still under doctors orders for bedrest. That word isn't in my vocab, but believe it or not I am actually doing it. I've slept lots, read lots on the internet, and just sort of kept it quiet about here in the day.
My newest quest is Copic markers and I'm loving all the video tutorials that are about to teach how to use these incredible markers. Next step, to get em out and have some fun. Just gotta get a day or more under my belt and I'll be up and colouring.
I just wanted to give credit to a wonderful site I've been hanging out at and if you have a bit of time dorp on by you just might wanna register and stay a bit. Let em know I sent yah.
www.simplyscrapping.ning.com

Here's a pic from my bunch of that I love of Taylor. Using a Mask-I forget where from-this picture really is one that each time I look at it I love a bit more.

Again and Again

2010-03-14T21:25:00.002-05:00

Lubbock visits again and again----is my blog that exciting?????
Just say Hi!!!!
and know that I know when and how many times you visit.

Image this.........

2010-03-13T23:23:00.003-05:00

you are nine years old, and you get your swim grade given to you. You are suppose to be in the sixth level, meaning you've passed all other levels before this one. You're at the pool standing waiting to be given your end of session report card and the instructor hands you your grade card and he's graded you in a level you are NOT in and he's indicated you have failed, oh yah by the way he's graded you for level five. Remember you are nine years old, can do the math and know you've already accomplished and passed this level just the month before.
Now how do you explain that to a child?
Then off you go to karate and all your friends tested last week, because you have been ill, in the hospital, taken outta the house in an ambulance with an oxygen mask administered, and a heart monitor on and there you stand cause you've missed a few weeks and all your friends get their next belt, you stand not getting one feeling sad and upset but don't want to cry.
How would you feel?
As a mom my heart was hurting today, but also I tried to find the positive, and this is what I have come up with.....if it doesn't kill you it will make you stronger.
So I'm heading to bed knowing Taylor's heart is heavy but she's able to test in a few weeks for her next belt and well, mom will just have to go to the pool and talk to the swim instructor who thinks he knows everything--yup he's about nineteen and as cute as heck, but thinks he's smarter than everyone and knows all there is to know.
Well mom will talk with him and let him know her feelings, not that that is gonna do any good, but I will know that momma bear has once again protected her cub from being hurt again. Wow, why didn't anyone tell me mommy's heart is gonna hurt more than her child's sometimes?

2010-03-06T22:04:00.004-05:00

It's been a bit and I've been busy so I thought I better drop in and say hey. The last two weeks it's either been Taylor, Mike or I who have been battling something health wise. Here I sit Saturday night with Taylor on the couch beside me, Mike upstairs probably sleeping and well me here blogging and bopping about on the internet.
I'm still wondering who keeps dropping in from Lubbock Texas, and I'm really hoping that that person will just say hello and introduce themselves. All comments are moderated and nothing is posted until approved by myself.
Anyway.......
not much happening here
same old same old
hope that this finds you smiling and enjoying the warm weather if you are in Ontario.
I saw this somewhere and really liked it, thought I would share

and don't forget to drop by Wescrap for the fun that's happening there this weekend....

Visitor Question

2010-02-28T12:37:00.003-05:00

wondering who you are visiting from Lubbock Texas, curious minds want to know??
Don't be shy say hi

Three new babies landed in my house yesterday

2010-02-20T23:44:00.006-05:00

Three new babies landed in my house yesterday
First of all
wow and thanks again to the ladies and the wonderful crop at WeSrap
I still can't believe that I won the prize
the Baby Cricut arrived yesterday,
the Cricut that
I won at
WESCRAP's online crop
and I've all but plugged it in,
I've read the instructions
and studied the manual

now tomorrow I hope to play

and

two baby love birds are now living in their condo in my living room
I've looked
and walked away so many times without buying
not so sure why I did this week, prob because of the price and
guess when the breeder sent me the pics I fell in love
I hymned and hawed
and last night caved
so
Diamond and Peach are now our latest pets and already they've found a
way to everyone's heart
we set up the cage
and tonight sat and held
and fed
they are the sweetest things
go to bed early
and today slept until 8
if only I could get Taylor and the dog to sleep all night I'd be sailing

thanks again ladies for the amazing crop
I can't wait to create with my new toy
hugs
m
e

Happy Family Day

2010-02-15T14:01:00.003-05:00

It's been a great weekend spent with those I love. Yesterday hubby's pain was so bad and like he has for the longest time he put it aside to go out with friends and Taylor and I to see --- what else but for children--The Tooth Fairy.

I laughed, I cried and I loved the movie, what a nice way to spend Valentines. Great movie and nice eyecandy for mommy!
Today in Ontario we are celebrating Family Day, guess a few years back the government decided it was important to have a day celebrating those we love and are with daily and so what a reason then this to have a day off work in February. Today Taylor and I made cupcakes, she is an amazing little trooper and wow, I was so impressed that every time she licked her fingers she remember without being reminded to wash her hands, what a good girl she is.
So however you are spending this day, I hope you enjoy the time with your love ones. Tell them a thousand times a day you love them, and then some, you can never say it enough.

My Take on My Valentines

2010-02-14T13:14:00.002-05:00

Where ever they go
where ever they are
whenever an animal is involved my two Valentines find love.
It's amazing to see both of them so comfortable with whatever animal or bird they might encounter. It's almost like the trust for each is there immediately and that each know that neither would ever hurt even a fly. I love watching my daughter and hubby intereact with nature, they have a love for the smallest creation in the world to the fastest, they share so many interest that it makes my heart proud when we spend family time together and have such a good time.
Thanks you two for always being my Valentines and Happy Valentines Day to all my friends.

Thanks ladies at Wescrap

2010-01-31T23:43:00.007-05:00

Not only do they run a no drama fun forum but their crop this weekend rocked. I got a few pages done and posted on their site. Tomorrow night I'm hoping to get possibly two digital layouts done and uploaded and the make and takes are on my list of thigs to do. Here's a layout, thanks for looking and hope that if you headed over there for some fun this weekend you had as much fun and I did.

2010-01-29T12:11:00.004-05:00

Come on over and join the girls at We-Scrap!!! They have an on-line crop going on right NOW! You can win a CRICUT!

I CAN'T BELIEVE I WON THE CRICUT!!!!!!!!

My guy the thinker

2010-01-19T19:42:00.004-05:00

I love this picture of my hubby. Every time I can catch a picture of him it's usually without him looking at the camera. This picture was one I really liked when I took it. We were at an airshow and I caught him sitting quietly thinking, he's always deep in thought and Taylor takes right after him.

Never can have enough

2010-01-13T23:45:00.007-05:00

I'm really gonna try to make a huge assortment of cards this year
I have enough stamps
all the paper I can possible use
bling, and bits and bobs
gonna set some goals and have some fun

It hurts me more than it hurts her

2010-01-13T22:32:00.000-05:00

Taylor fell asleep on our bed tonight
I just woke her to give her her insulin
she woke
I asked her which arm
she moaned and pointed to her left
I gave her the needle
she sat up and said
yah know that needle
can I just skip it tonight

she never even felt it

she was just diagnosed in I think November
last year is such a blurr with all that went wrong
but she is doing so well
and we are so proud of her
does anyone else here have a child with Type 1 Diabetes?
just wondering
sometimes it would be so nice to talk to someone who is going through it too

Blog Candy Give Away...

2010-01-11T15:28:00.004-05:00

Check out this
so I've done it. today I sat and blog hopped, when I should of been doing a whole lot of other things I sat and played about on the computer
and wow
check this out!!!
Jess' Obsession: It's My First Blogaversary!

I Officially Did It.....

2010-01-09T20:22:00.003-05:00

For a long long time now, I've taken Taylor to the gym to either swim or for her karate, and I've sat and chatted with other parents, never really doing anything for myself. Yet there I've sat at the gym each week, putting off taking care of me. With some encouragement from some wonderful ladies at www.wescrap.com I've started walking the track. Last night I officially walked for thirty minutes and again today I walked with a friend. It was hard last night doing it alone, but today the time breezed by. A friend of mine is at Disney World running a marathon in memory of her mom, she'll be my Friday night partner when she's back in town. Wow, I'm so proud of me, it's time I took the bull by the horns and did something to feel good, and I'm gonna do this!
Thanks Nancy for offering to be my Friday night buddy, and Marika for being there today and hopefully weekly when the girls are in swimming, and a HUGE thank you to the girls at Wescrap, not only are they amazing scrappers, but they really care about each other there and have inspired so many to do little things, baby steps to feel good about themselves. A huge thank you goes out to Ally for initiating it all by starting her own adventure, she's one talented, creative lady who has so inspired so many to start this year off with a positive note.

Blog Hop Happeing

2010-01-01T20:56:00.012-05:00

What a way to ring in the New Year.....but with a blog hop!!!
www.scrapbookchallenges.ning.com
See a topic post here
www.scrapbookchallenges.ning.com
What an amazing new place I've found to hang out at, come on over and see all that is happening, the sketches are amazing and well they just might motivate me!!!

OuT wiTh tHe oLd.....

2009-12-30T20:20:00.003-05:00

Out with the old and in with the new................remain positive, think positively, and stay positive. With all that has gone in in 2009 my goal is to somehow, someway, stay positive.
I'm going to keep a journal daily full of positive things that have happened in the day. I'm going to use this as a tool for looking at life differently. With that in mind it's out with everything that has gone wrong, learn lessons from all that has happened and usher the new year in with family and friends with as much positiveness as possible, are yah with me????
I wish all my friends a year full of wonderful memories, cherished happenings, and lots of photos to scrap about to create memories on paper creatively.
Hugs
m
e

Home for the Holidays

2009-12-26T16:47:00.003-05:00

This last little bit has been a time when home is very comforting with all that we are enduring in our lives. My husband's father has been battling cancer for the last little bit and on the twenty second of this month, his fight ended. Michael was there holding his hand telling him to rest peacefully. It's been an odd Christmas but one that we have made enjoyable for Taylor. Nothing seemed organized or prepared, but it all came together. We wrapped presents Christmas Eve with our hearts being very heavy, but we knew that's what Taylor's Opa would of wanted us to do. We spent Christmas day with my parents, which was very pleasant but it was a day that felt empty when we phoned Oma to wish her a Merry Christmas and Opa wasn't there to speak to.
I won't say it's been easy, he fought his aggressive lung cancer with all he could. It tore me apart to see what it had done to him. I can't understand why we allow something to take hold of our loved ones with us not being able to do anything but stand by and watch their pain and suffering. All that is comforting me is knowing he is at peace. Believe it or not the other day Taylor and I were travelling on our major highway when Taylor looked over and saw the most beautiful dog, one just like her Opa used to own. I told Taylor it was a sign, Prince was there to tell us that him and Opa were in Heaven together walking and playing. That sign was comforting to me and it was a way to let Taylor know that things would be better now for Opa, a way without pain and a way with those and that that he loved. I've learned alot this year from all that has gone on, but the one thing I have learned is that home and family will always be there and it's important to show them your love and share your love with them daily.

Dear Anonymous....

2009-12-14T22:04:00.003-05:00

Someone recently left a comment on my blog signed from Anonymous. I was on my way to work, stopped at a red light and saw that there was a message on my phone. When I got to where I was parking I had a few minutes to read the message and it was from Anonymous. I just want to say I'm so glad you found my blog, you are so right, sometimes things happen for a reason, sometimes we find out why and other times we never are to know. Alot of my life has been that this last while, I'm trying to put together why things happen, to find reasons, to seek positive experiences from all the bad. I used to make excuses for friends who hurt me, then I learned that they never really were friends. Someone once asked me how many friends I really have and I had to think about that. Sure I have a few friends who I talk to every now and then, those people who we don't speak for a bit and then when we retouch base it feels like we really never had time separating us. But lately I have to say my true friends are my internet friends. They have been there when I needed to vent, they have come from somewhere and stuck about, they have commented on my blog and have become those I really trust, and they have been at scrap sites and I have gotten to know them and their likes and dislikes through their posts and pages.
Whoever you are anonymous I just wanted to say thanks for your comment, I read it and tears were in my eyes. You are welcome to come here anytime, and I hope you do and always say hi. I post about my experiences because what I am going through sometimes seems like such a nightmare, but it's not, it's reality. Sorry you are going through the same things, it doesn't seem like a very happy time for either of us right now. Just know that if you ever feel like saying hi and leaving a message I am here and will read and if whenthe opportunity will respond. When I write I write from my heart, it gives me the ability to just put my thoughts and experiences down and for doing that it helps me accept, understand, and work through all my stuff.
I'm thankful for all my internet friends, I could type their names all now but they know who they are, and I truly appreciate all that do and have done for me. Those who have touched my heart I hope to always have in my life. I hope to be able to be that friend that they are to me. Thanks anonymous and everyone else forstopping by and for being my friend, it means alot to me to have you all in my life!

Can't understand why......warning long winded post.

2009-12-12T22:18:00.007-05:00

Today has been one of those days where I just can't comprehend life. It's been a week of whirl wind emotions, but today I think has been one of the hardest in a long, long time.
We went up to see Michael's father today. He as been transferred from the critical care floor in the hospital to the palliative care floor at a residence centre. After dropping Taylor off at karate we headed up to find him in a terrible state of pain and suffering. He was discontent laying in the bed, tried to sit up, was unable to do so without shaking terribly and then wanted to lay down again but could not get comfortable. Seeing him in the state broke my heart but what hurt the most was that when we were leaving he was finally laying somewhat peacefully that it was best that I not give him my usual kiss on his foreheaed, as the sides of the bed were up and we didn't want to wake him. We left his room, me in tears, hubby barely holding on to have to stand and wait for an elevator. I didn't see the nurse come up from behind, who knows maybe she was ahead of us. However she was on the elevator when I stood and cried in hubby's arms without even realizing she was there. When I could finally muster up enough ability to speak without crying I commented to hubby about us being kinder to our pets than we are to each other making each other suffer so in the midst of waiting for our bodies to break down enough till we just can't go on. This kind nurse, who had been there watching started to talk. She first asked if Michael was the son of the person's room we were in. When she found out he was, she spoke to us of the last few days that she had been in to take care of Michael's father. She spoke of all he ate, drank, and the medicines he had been given. She knew of his pain, of his discomfort and she knew of our pain and emotions. She spoke so compassionately and yet with such conviction of her profession that she made us feel so safe and comfortable with her being there to take care of him when we can't. Do I believe in angels? I do, and I truly believe this nurse is one in the job she is doing. I just can't understand why we have to suffer and why there isn't a cure to cancer, there must be one or something that can be done to minimize what people must go through. I just can't understand why life is sometimes so cruel.

After having left the residence where we spent a few hours sitting just holding Michael's father's hand while he slept, we headed out to attempt to do some Christmas shopping. It wasn't easy to change our mood or spirits, but for Taylor we must create and make her holiday one that she has fond memories of the happiness of all the miracles of the holiday. If only she knew and understood, but she doesn't and would not understand, that financially life will be very stressful over the next few weeks financially, for we have just found out that hubby's benefits for short term illness run out just before Christmas and that he will be on a very minimual recieving end of money for fifteen weeks, again we are screwed--sorry for the language, but honestly, he is the victim, he was hit from behind on the 401 while stopped by a driver driving between 60 and 70 kms.
Anyway, when out shopping we only walked a short distance in a local mall, but that was enough to create havoc on hubby's body. He was in such discomfort as his pain meds had wore off, that it truly broke my heart to see his inability to walk without pain.
I'm sitting here writing this knowing that it's alot of jumbled words telling about a day full of emotional distress and upset, but I have to have a place to vent. My blog is a place where I'm able to write about my feelings, share my thoughts and well if anyone really is reading, it's words for them to understand my emotions right now. We have been told that hubby is probably being videotaped and that he is probably being watched daily for all his activity. I invite that person or people into our home, we have nothing to hide. We walked in the door tonight, hubby headed right up stairs to bed, painfully took off his clothing, dressed in his casual clothes, took his meds for pain and a sleeping pill with gravel because the sleeping pill alone causes nightmares, and has been laying in the bed quietly waiting till the medications somewhat relieve some of the pain.
I have to remind myself to not be to emotional for the sake of Taylor not making any more than what she already is stressed. I invite those people who may be watching us into our lives to see how this life of the last year has been. We have not had a picnic, it has been a nightmare. Taylor has not slept the last eleven weeks worrying about her father, her grandfather, her recent diagnoses of diabetes, and her math marks which have dropped drastically, and are bothering her immensely. However in all her drama and turmoil she has successfully tested last night for her fifth belt in karate. The test was almost an hour in length with probably close to fifteen kadas having to be preformed, and she successfully passed. Tomorrow she will get her next belt, for that I am grateful as it's something that will put a smile on our faces and in our hearts as we are so very proud of her.
With all I have written if you have read this far, love your loved ones. Treat each day as a special one, dance like no one is watching, use your good china as if it's that last time you will drink from that cup and that you don't want it in the cupboard collecting dust, and live life as if each moment might be your last. Cherish each day, believe in all you do, and hug your loved ones always and tell them how much you love them. Your actions and words will make someones heart happy, and will put a memory in their mind that will be pleasant to think of one day and remember as a good time in life!

I'm so proud of.......

2009-12-05T21:34:00.003-05:00

Taylor. Last night she wanted to give herself the insulin in the worse way. She tried, actually put the needle in and pulled it out again. Shed a few tear, and tried again. I was so proud that she did it herself. Tonight when I told her it was time she actually asked me if I would mind if she did it herself. I'm so proud of her and her being such a big girl with what she is going through. I'm not so sure I would be as brave. Now all we have to do is manage sleeping through the night. Any suggestions on how I can make this happen??? If it's not nightmares, she's not feeling well. I've resolved to just jumping into bed beside her because if I don't the whole house is up and in an uproar. The dog roams, hubby can't get back to sleep, and I get so frustrated I end up threatening to take tv away for a month, and how sad would that be to do with all the Christmas specials on? So for now I tell her to move on over and I just pull up a pillow beside her. One step at a time and I truly believe that now she can administer the insulin she might not have so many fears running about in her head that things just might settle down.
Thanks for listening to me vent again, I promise one day soon you will see a new layout, for now I'm just happy getting through a day without blowing a headgasket. LOL

FYI

2009-12-04T22:10:00.002-05:00

Just wanted everyone to know that the site that I operate my forum out of has done some updating and sort of fixing. Only problem is that the fixing has created the issue of needing to resave the web site if you have it bookmarked. For some reason some can't log in. So retype the www. and off you go or follow the sidebar to the site. Hugs and sorry.

Getting there.......

2009-12-01T21:51:00.004-05:00

and two posts in one day, can you believe it?
After dropping Taylor off at school and stopping by my parents home to say hello, I came home, had a sleep, and finally spent a bit more time in the basement working on getting my scrapping space organized. I didn't realize that for the longest time it bothered me as much as it has not being organized and tidied. It's been a bit since I've thought about scrappin to be honest. With all that has gone on this year scrapping has been the last thing on my mind, but I've come to the conclusion that I need some "me time". Some time to do what I enjoy, and, to spend time doing with Taylor too. She's one creative little cookie and when she is in my space with me it's fun seeing her do, and believe it or not it's as exciting seeing her finish her layouts as it is creating one myself.

Also today I spent some time with hubby, just him and I. I wasn't sure what we would do, he's been so sick and in constant pain from his car accident. My heart hurts so to see him in pain, but he put everything aside today and suggested we go to a movie. With Taylor being in school and me not working it was the perfect day to go, and what did we see? Twilight Saga...New Moon. Did I enjoy it, yeah. Was it all it was hyped to be, I didn't think so. Who would I say I prefer, the wolves. Would I go again, no, but it was a great way to spend some time with hubby, and for him to have suggested it was sweet. We even managed to do dinner out and that was fun and once I was off to pick up Taylor it was time for home and time for mommy and daddy to spend time with her. She's been having a real hard time with all, not sleeping has been one of the biggest issues. Today I called the doctor and she suggested for us to change the administration time of insulin. Tomorrow we will adminsiter it at night, if this doesn't change her sleeping patterns we will talk with the doctor in more detail during our next visit. All I keep saying is one day at a time, and each day baby steps, those simple words keep my grounded and help me with all I do along the way to just "getting there".
Thanks for reading my blah blah blah blah blah. Keeping my thoughts in one place helps and once I'm scrappin more again I will post so that it's just not all about my life in words.

Do you believe in angels

2009-12-01T12:15:00.004-05:00

I created this layout a bit ago and kept it tucked away until now. Taylor and our dog Tika are the best of friends. Funny how love and devotion come so easy to children and pets. They are inseparable and often you will find one snuggling the other in the oddest places. Right about now both need angels and some good thoughts sent their way, Taylor having just been diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes and well Tika is just Tika, she's healing slowly after having hurt her knee jumping off the deck to chase something in the backyard. So I believe in angels and really hope that one is watching over both of them to guide them on their adventures but to most of all just be sure they are safe and know that they are cared for.
You will probably find me writing lots on my blog about our new adventure with Taylor, it helps me put my thoughts somewhere and digest all we are going through, hope you don't mind reading abit about what's happening in our lives that way.
Hugs and thanks for visiting
I found this digi kit on digifree and can't find the info on who designed it, I'd love to give credit to the artist and will hunt through my files, but some were lost when my mini drive was broke so it may be impossible to post the designer. If you recognize the kit please let me know so I can give to where credit is due

Major Milestones

2009-11-30T19:23:00.002-05:00

We've been through a week of insulin injections and we've come a long way baby--daddy actually has been taught by Taylor how to do the injections--and he is doing it on a request basis. This is really big news in our house cause daddy is phobic of needles and rightfully so after having two of them broke off in his body. So I'm proud of him for taking this big step in our new adventure.
One day at a time--baby steps and lots of emotional ups and downs but we will do it--we can do anything as a family.

2009-11-19T14:31:00.009-05:00

This little guy has found a way into our home, it's become Taylor's new friend whether she wants it to be her friend or not. Yup our new adventure has us learning all about Type 1 Diabetes and how to handle it in our lives and well, we've learned so far how to use this insulin pen and when to use it and now we will see what the future has in store for us. It would be easy to say that Taylor has Type 1 Diabets, however we never do anything the easy way in our family. Apparently there is a third type of diabetes called Mody-Mature onset of diabetes in the young child Taylor wil be tested for this soon but for now the treatment is the same as Type 1-insulin, so today we have started that.
This has been a year I'd like to forget, but never the less it's been a year full of memories. Maybe when I can sit and the air clears I will scrap about them but for now I'm doing the best I can do to just do, does that make sense?
Anyway
gonna go do some relaxing before I'm off again on taxi duty picking Taylor up from school and then back home again to get dinner ready.

What are you thankful for???

2009-11-14T21:11:00.004-05:00

Not so sure if you know but because so many of the people I have gotten to know on this wonderful world of the web have been lost because of sites closing I decided to create a forum. Well on that forum I've been doing something that was a challenge by a friend. That was to each day write down what I am thankful for. So far it's been easy, because most things in my life I appreciate or am grateful to have. Try it, each day write what you are thankful for, post it somewhere and read often. It really makes you realize what in your life is important, not that I didn't know but that it truly reinforces things.
Heck come on over to the forum, register and become involved. It's a place where friends can remain friends and keep in touch when the sites they visit are no long there.
On the sidebar is the link to the forum, I'd love to have you there.

This reminds me of......

2009-11-10T21:03:00.006-05:00

when I was a little girl. I always felt so protected in my daddy's arms. We would sit on Sunday nights and watch The Wonderful World of Disney. Taylor in her daddy's arms reminds me of when I was a little girl and always felt so safe when my daddy hugged me or held me. Thanks for looking.
Credit--unknow digital scrapbook kit-will post info when I am able to relocate it

Enough Already

2009-11-10T20:55:00.002-05:00

I'm so done with this year. I've tried to remain positive, I've even tried to look for all the positive in everything that has gone wrong. However I've about had enough already, for the last few days the truck has been chugging--that's the only way I could figure out how to describe it. Well turns out it's a problem that needs to be fixed badly and that it's covered by warranty, thankgoodness. However after everything else that has gone wrong this year it's just one more thing to add to the list.
With all that we have endured we remain positive, contiune to smile and just keeping moving forward. Today I read somewhere I'm suppose to look not expect everything upfront, that life would be boring without struggle. Ok I truly get it but when is enough enough.
Oh yah as I type this my comma key is not working right, just one more thing to add to the list. Life sure isn't boring but it's also not relaxing either = lol.

2009-11-09T11:06:00.002-05:00

I've spent the morning blog hopping, I was actually suppose to be in the basement working on my scrapping space but after recieving a phone call from the doctors office Taylor is to go to on Friday, I was needing to call the government and request a temporary version code for her Health Card Number as we still haven't got her new one in the mail--that's another story. Sooo to make a long story short here I sat blog hopping on hold. The way I look at it it's not wasting time, I'm killing two birds with one stone, and wow there sure is alot out there to read and learn about copic markers. One thing I have to do is thank my friend Kimmy who gave me some valuable reading info and set me straight on the what to know about the markers. Now all I need is a whole lot of money and some time to play and I'm all set. Gonna go do some stuff about the house and maybe play with the markers I did get.
Hugs

Copic Crazy

2009-11-05T18:51:00.002-05:00

I've been toying with the idea of going CoPiC cRaZy, it seems to be the latest craze in card making and stamping. Why not combine some fun stamping with the latest kewl tool........
so off I went today to have a peak at my local art store...... and totally wow!!!!!
they are there and cheaper then I've seen in all my on line searching. So what did I do, I picked up a few, to add to my prisma marker set, and once I get some time I'm gonna play.
I'm loving the Magnolia stamps and a scrapbook store near by is now importing them so I'm double excited about some new opportunities of buying.
Wish me luck in finding some time, and oh yah slowly I'm getting my "play space" organized, it's my "gotta get done" project cause it's been bugging me far tooooo long.

Anyway
hugs
be back later
oh yah and if yah haven't had the flu stay healthly!!!

Halloween Layout

2009-11-01T20:47:00.006-05:00

It's not this year's costume but non the less it's a Halloween layout that I completed using the October kit from The Shaker Box. Linda allowed me to create with her kit and I loved it, she has such a great eye for putting paper and bling together. I'm really sad to see her store closing but if you hurry over you'd be able to save with the sale she has happening. Anyway here's my layout, thanks for looking.

and here's the link to
www.theshakerbox.com

Actually Scrapping

2009-10-24T23:28:00.002-05:00

It's been a bit and I've gone between digi and paper again but I've gotta say I've been having fun doing challenges from Wescrap.com and well, I've got three creations posted in their gallery I've completed. It's been fun and Taylor as yuck as she's been feeling was inspired to participate in their Steal the RAK challenge. It was amazing watching her intrigued by what was posted next and seeing her come up with some amazing comments....Thanks ladies at Wescrap.com.......you have some talented ladies on your new design team and I'm hoping to stay awhile there and be inspired by everyone.

2009-10-22T20:58:00.003-05:00

October found me creating for The Shaker Box, this layout was done using all items from the kit. I really enjoyed the opporunity to create for Linda, and I honestly have to say the kits are amazing, Linda really has a creative eye for putting paper and elements together to create one rocking opprotunity to create with.
Sadly Linda is closing her store, I'll miss her forum and I'll miss the opportunity of seeing all the creations of the amazing friends that I made there.
Who knows where we will meet again, but for sure I know they are all invited to the forum I created.

A FoRuM FoR FrIeNds

2009-10-22T20:50:00.002-05:00

I've realized that almost every site that I've belonged to in the last few years has either closed or is closing.
How sad is that?
I've lost too many good friends on the big wide world of the scrapping net, so I decided to create a forum. Look on the sidebar and come see us, register and join our conversations and post. The fourm is not conncected to anyone or any store. Post your creations, advertise your items for sale, or share your blogs.
I'm hoping to grow, and I'm hoping that everyone there shares what they want to inspire others to do.

What an opportunity

2009-10-18T11:54:00.002-05:00

I've seen these stamps and fallen in love
and wow
talk about opportunity
this site
www.kelliewinnell.com.au
is actually having a guest design team call
I'd so love the chance to play with their stamps
I've sent off a blurb about me and I'm keeping my fingers crossed
why not have a look
you just might be the newest person-with me of course on the team
hugs
and good luck

Another weekend already over

2009-10-12T18:07:00.002-05:00

Another weekend and it's almost time to set that alarm for work tomorrow. This weekeend has flown but and it seems like I've hardly sat even for a minute.

Yesterday we spent the day at the pumpkin patch, and wow was it cold. It wouldn't of been a trip to the patch if we hadn't of gone out on the tractor into the field to pick our pumpkin. Man we were so cold but it was fun and Taylor picked the one that she found was "just right".
We also spent today doing outside work and being sure that all was ready for winter.
It sure hurts my heart to see hubby in the pain he is in. He had to head to the truck early yesterday as he was in so much pain, but it was nice to have him there and spend a few minutes with us just to say for another year we kept tradition. I truly hope that the person that hit him knows that life has been changed drastically at this end.

Anyway, my parents came down tonight for dinner. They didn't stay long, but it was nice to have them here to share our Thanksgiving dinner with us.
Now here we sit, soon heading to bed, I'm exhausted and I know Taylor is just about ready for bed, when she gets quiet and still I know she is winding down.
Hope tomorrow is a great one for everyone.

Just also a friendly invite to all my friends to take a look at the sidebar and come on over to the forum for friends.
hugs
m
e

Forum Starting to Grow

2009-10-05T21:57:00.006-05:00

The little forum for friends is starting to grow.........come on over, check us out, register and stay awhile. It's a small place for friends and creavity to come together. Along the way a lot of friends have been lost when sites close, so I thought I would create a place where everyone can hang their hat and call home.
Check us out....
www,justanotherdayforscrapping.lefora.com

Card Making Day Creation

2009-10-03T21:20:00.005-05:00

To celebrate Card Making Day, Taylor and I spent some time creating and having fun in our little scrapbook space together, Linda over at The Shaker Box inspired me to create with her challenge.
Here is our display of cards we made, thanks for looking...

Something to Share....

2009-09-21T21:19:00.010-05:00

Sitting here tonight after finding out another one of my favourite online sites is closing I decided to create a forum for anyone who is interested in stopping by and chatting about scrapbooking. I'm not looking to have a site that grows huge but... I'm hoping to have a site that will keep the friendships I have developed along the way. There are so many people that I have gotten to know and I want to be able to see and continue to share all that we cherish as we continue to develop our pages of memories.
Stop on by
Register
and stay awhile and chat
post your creations
and maybe
share or teach others your techniques that you have learned along the way
www.justanotherdayforscrapping.lefora.com

First good day in a long long time

2009-09-18T20:26:00.002-05:00

Thinking positive really does do alot for how things can be. Today I woke, got ready, got Taylor ready for school and suggested to hubby to get ready and come with us so him and I could spend the day together before I had to work. It was the first day in a long long time that we both laughed a bit, smiled alot, and talked while driving. His pain was minimal, his headache was there but not intense and he was able to enjoy lunch out without letting the noise of the place where we were eating at bother him to the degree that he had to leave. You just never know what curve ball life will send your way, but when it's a ball yah just can't miss swinging at why not. His accident has taught us to go with the good days and just take it easy during the bad. We had fun, but after a long day of being out he is exhausted and well to be honest so am I. I wanted to post this because for a long time pain and misery has ruled our lives. I so wish I had a wand I could wave that could make the ill better, the people in pain be pain free, and for each day to be a happy one. Thanks for reading my blog. I've got scrappin on my mind just gotta get the time to get some things done.

New site, their kit.....

2009-09-05T22:06:00.006-05:00

Recently I joined a new site, concentrating strickly on digital scrapbooking. I've been intrigued by the site as there is always so much going on, sometimes I'm overwhelmed by all but so far it's been a good overwhelmed. LOL
Here's a layout I completed using one of their kits for the September Secret Garden Challenge......

Thanks for looking
and
here's the link to the site
www.digitalscrapgarden.com

2009-08-26T19:55:00.004-05:00

Just when I thougt I was giving it up I sit and create a layout using a kit I've come acrossed and fall in love again.
I really need to get organzied in the basement so I can play about with my paper and emblishments, but tonight I've just sat and had fun with this kit I came across at Digifree.

Thanks for looking
Kit Credit to CinnamonDesigns_,Tinette, mystique

I did it!!!

2009-08-22T21:53:00.008-05:00

After a long and dreadful day, I took some me time and got to create. It's the first of what I hope is many.
Thanks for looking...................can't wait to create more and share.

The challenge at www.theshakerbox.com was to create a monochromatic page. I found it a wee bit hard as I had so many ideas popping into my head, but it was fun and it really brought me back into the paper scrapping world in a fun way.

The journalling on the back read........From butterflies and bows, to skeltons and rock, that's what little girls are made of.
Taylor so desperately wanted a guitar for Christmas and even with a buckle break to her arm she wasn't gonna let that stop her from playing with what Santa brought her.

Trying to teach Taylor

2009-08-21T20:04:00.002-05:00

I'm always looking at these two houses on my way to drop Taylor off in the mornings at my parents home. I grew up in the house that my parents are still living in and daily I drive by these two homes that have been there forever but just recently have been given major face lifts.
Tonight on the way home, I was driving by slowing and looked to see the lady of one house struggling with crutches and her dog wrapped totally in a bush with it's leash. I rolled down my window and asked her what she had done to herself, not really sure of any other way that I could comment. She looked up, and said well, she was in a real mess and couldn't get the dog unstuck. I parked the truck, got Taylor out and approached the poor tied up puppy talking to it the whole way telling it was a good little girl it was, yup it had on a pretty pink collar. When I got up to it the dog was ok with me helping it and the lady was near tears. She said it was the worst day of her week, she had broke her foot and was having a real bad time doing stuff. The dog was unstuck, and she invited Taylor and I in when I asked if she was in need of having help with anything else. She mentioned she had garbage that needed to be taken out and so in we went to help her with this task. Out went the garbage, and conversation was sparked.
I'm not writing this to say again I've helped someone and want a pat on my back. I'm sharing my story because it made me feel good to have helped someone. My motive is that I'm trying to help teach Taylor the way of achieving a feeling or worth is not by what we own of materialistic value, but of what we do to help others.
When we left this lady gave both of us a hug and called herself "grandma Sandy" for Taylor. Taylor's eyes lit up. Our family is small and not of any cousins for Taylor, so this thrilled her when the relationship was sparked. ]
I Know that we will have several more encounters, as I'm always looking at the love she has put into her new little home and now that we've formally met I'm sure we'll have more time to chat and get to know one another. Sandy was thrilled when I told her her house was the one the block with the cutest little face lift.

Another Year Older

2009-08-16T21:41:00.003-05:00

You know I never really have been excited about having another birthday, but today's was special. Taylor and my hubby really made my day special. Both greeted me when I woke with a kiss, and then it was downstairs to see my present that Taylor just couldn't wait to give me. She's quite the little shopper and was so excited to give me the cutest solar powered turtle light. I love love love it and it's already outside on the deck. Taylor and her daddy also surprised me with a cute little stamp that I have had my eye on for a bit and neither knew so it was a total surprise that Taylor picked that one in her travles.
Taylor also spent two hours at the gym completing a karate test for her third belt. She amazes me with her total compassion for everything she does. She won't know whether she passed or not until next week, but she sure was feeling confident about how the test went.
I just wanted to say thanks to all my friends that took a minute to wish me Happy Birthday. Your wishes made my heart happy, thanks so much for your hellos and Happy Birthday wishes, if I could have one wish and it come true it would be for my hubby to be pain free and to be able to get on with his life the way it was before his car accident. I don't think that's asking too much so if there really is a birthday fairy please please please wave your wand over my hubby's head and make him all better.

Second post today....I should probably be in bed but....

2009-08-14T22:29:00.004-05:00

tonight I sat here creating. Back to digital again, just wanting to learn and figure out a few things, here I sat playing with photo masks and well finally I did what I wanted to do but I'm so tired I can't remember what I did. Yup, I probably should be in bed but I couldn't walk away defeated. I truly hope that Taylor develops the charastic of finishing a task when she starts one. However I hope she learns things faster than I do cause this sure took me a long time to figure out, but you be the judge, does it look ok???

Oh and I changed my siggy too, guess I'm trying to exercise my brain, only problem is right now it's telling me to log off, and head to bed. Thanks for stopping by, leave a comment, I'd love to hear from you.

Kit Credit to: PrettyJu©
Mask Credit to: Babinetky

ok Don't get me wrong......

2009-08-14T20:41:00.002-05:00

I'm not a complainer, honestly, but after this week I can't honestly believe that all that is happening in our lives is happening. I have to start out by saying how proud I am of my hubby with all he is going through to recover from the car accident he was in, he can't be faulted in any way. He has attempted to do all he can to get better and stronger. It just amazes me that some people in this world lack compassion for others. Just this week he has seriously reacted to a medication that was prescribed to him, he has been asked to attend appointments that suggest they are four hours in lenght, he arrives after having a driver arranged to take him there and the appointment only lasts one hour and he has to attempt to get the driver back as he is stranded there until arrangements can be made. His work place didn't put his pay in the bank, and their only response was "oops sorry for the mistake."
I truly wish that things only get better, we know we are not the first to have to deal with all this nonsense, and we won't be the last, but how much do yah have to endure? I think I posted on my facebook I'm not gonna sit and cry I'm just gonna pull up my big girl panties and get done what needs to be done, heck I might even use them as a parachute to jump off the closest hill with, lol.
Thanks for stopping by and hey why not join my blog as a follower, I'd love to have yah stop by again. Soon I plan on getting my scrappy stuff organized and well then I'll be a non stop scrappin machine lol.

Have you been here yet????

2009-08-11T22:23:00.005-05:00

Here's a blog after my heart. Have you heard of or have you been to Scrap It Forward, I mean think of the concept, scrapbook creating and the ability to help someone, or something. I have to be honest I have had good intentions twice to send the items they were looking for, but with the way my life has been when I finally went to send Christine actually mentinoed that I need not as I was a wee bit late. Yah hubby and car accident lead to not getting things done, but how sweet has the site been but twice awarding me a prize, and I will be honest they have inspired me in life to pay if forward lots lately and it so make my heart happier doing so when I can.
I'm hoping that I can send a few people their way, go check them out,
www.scrapitforward.com
and see what's happening this week, yup you are right more blog candy and you don't even need to create to be entered into the draw to receive some. I'm keeping my fingers crossed that I win, wouldn't that be an amazing birthday prize, oops did I say that outloud, but shusssh don't tell anyone mine's soon.

Promise Not To Laugh

2009-08-08T19:39:00.003-05:00

Ok I'm gonna share something that well it did make me laugh, but it's not ok for you to laugh, ok???
Today like any other Saturday, started off with me driving Taylor to swimming lessons. After swimming lessons we headed to my parents cause I forgot to bring her blood testing kit home last night, yah I know something so important but that's another story. So, we pick it up head home have lunch and convince hubby to come back to the gym for Taylor's karate. During her karate we drove over to the magazine shop and hubby is always buying a treat there so how could I say no when he offered me a butter tart. I mean, I've been dieting, and that butter tart looked up at me and said--Lisa you can't leave and bet yah can't just eat one.
This is the part, when we were heading out there was a man sitting on the bench by the truck. He'd been down on his luck, sitting there with all his worldly possessions watching everyone go by. Well, looking at the package I realized that eating two would defeat the dieting all week long, so I approached the gentleman and offered him one explaining why and he smile, refused, and then started to tell me that dieting wasn't about when you eat like some say, it's about what you eat, I sort of smiled knowing how true this is. I couldn't believe it, he actually said no. Rejection hurts did you know that. Being told no really bugged me, and especially when my wonderful, loving, caring, husband looked at me and commented. Right about now I forget his comment, however being laughed at about being rejected stunk. Well, sometimes yah just can't do something nice all the time, so know what? After I log off I'm gonna go eat that other butter tart. See that man was smart after all, he was slender, happy, and one butter tart less in weight..... lol. Ok be honest did you laugh at me being rejected too?

Friendships have a Way of Growing Without Us Knowing

2009-08-06T20:29:00.006-05:00

Friendship has a way of growing without us knowing but when it happens it's like a rose. It starts to grow slowly then blooms into a wonderful thing.
I happened upon Jan's blog one night, linked her's to mine, and then in my total surprise was given by her a bind-it all. I haven't had the chance to create with it due to my circumstances here, but I have so many intentions of making family members Christmas gifts.
Then again to my total disbelief Jan awarded me "The Circle of Friendship Award." Thanks Jan for thinking of me as a friend, it's made my heart smile tonight.
Here's a link to Jan's blog if you are wanting to see some fasinating creations, each time I visit I am so inspired!
www.papercraftpleasures.blogspot.com

Here are the rules for this award: To pick up the Circle of Friends Blog Award cut and paste the award logo and use it on your own blog. Nominate 5 other bloggers you feel have become part of your circle of friends. Link to your nominees within your blog post. Include these instructions on how to pick up the award in your blog post. Link back to the person who gave you the award in your blog post, to show your appreciation. Comment on their blogs to let them know they've received the award.

In an appreiciation of five friends who have been there for me the last bit when things just seem to never end in anything but turmoil I'm awarding this award to: ScrappeeDiane, prettypilot2002, amy, leslie, and Mindy. These people probably don't realize how they have touched my life, but since my husbands car accident this year, they've been about when things have been rough, they've shared a comment about something, or they've crafted the most amazing layouts and creations that put a smile on my face when I have blog hopped. Thanks ladies for being there and being a true friend.

What a small world

2009-07-30T22:23:00.005-05:00

On Thursdays for the past two years my father has taken Taylor to the lake in the town where he lives. A program is provided there for young individuals with special needs to interact with the community by providing a craft and sports activity for young children from the town who head to the lake for a bit of fun. Today I wasn't required to be at work until later in the morning so I drove Taylor over to meet my father.At first I took pictures of her on the swing-with scrapbooking on my mind, however once the activities started Taylor was settled at a picnic table for the craft, then my father and I sat and began chatting at a near by table. I watched a bus arrive, the children depart, and when I was sitting I started playing with my cell phone, only to have my father request that I put it away while we talk, sorry I'm addicted as it has the internet and well I constantly play about on it.
A second later I heard a cry and looked about to find a lady laying on the ground crying profusely with pain. Off I went with my cell phone in hand to find her needing medical attention and care. I took a lead roll, called 911 and took the responsibility over of providing first aid. To make a long story short the fire department and ambulance arrived, and I left for work.
Tonight when I got home there were two phone calls on my cell and one on our home land line. A person left a number for me to call, and when I returned her call I was asked if I was at a certain place today and that was it me who applied first aid. I hesitated to answer at first, wondering what the issues were as the woman left by ambulance and was attended to by the professionals who knew what was needing to be done. The person continued to tell me that this person whom I helped was a friend and when I identified myself apparently I did so suggesting my work place, that I knew first aid and being that she was from a child care centre she knew by the way I took charge with the children being redirected that she knew I was or had supervisor experience and that she felt so comfortable being in my care.
I'm not writting this to brag, I'm just writing this to say again in life, what a small world it is, and that often no matter where we are our actions can be seen, heard or known to some without us even realizing it. The person who called just happens to be a woman who I have worked with, our daughters are on the competitive baton team together, and she just knew by the way the person described me that it was me who helped.
On the way home tonight, I was wondering how this person was, I thought I would never know and that I was just that person's angel there when something was needing to be done. The call answered my question, you can imagine my surprise over the phone conversation. This injured person will be off work for a while but she is safe and was thankful for my help. I am grateful to know she is ok, and that she appreciated my involvement.
First aid is never done looking for a pat on the back, it's done because we are trained, and care for those who may need our help. Thanks for reading my long post and if I can teach anyone one thing, that would be to act with knowledge, act with care and concern, and always just do the best you can do to help others.

We're so proud

2009-07-29T21:13:00.003-05:00

I should of post this a bit ago but I just forgot, Taylor has been in karate for a bit now and we were so proud when she was presented with her first belt, a purle stripe. Daddy and I were there to see and well she had just come back from a baton competition and it was exciting for us to be able to make it to the presentation.
She's not only a little lady in makeup for baton but put on that gee and she sure knows what she is doing. Way to go girlie, keep up the amazing things you do, you have the ability to go where your wings will fly you.

Absolutely Amazing

2009-07-22T21:05:00.003-05:00

I've studied psychology, I've studied child development, but each day I'm amazed by just sitting back and watching or listening to what Taylor has to say. She seems to always be on the same page as me, she understands things that sometimes I don't, and she is always able to put a smile on my and her father's face.
Tonight we were sitting at a table and she started to comment about a lady sitting a bit away from us at another table in the restaurant, how she must be having mid-life crisis. I almost chocked on my drink, and hubby asked her how she knew all she was saying. She reminded him of how he told her about some guy driving a souped up sports car and not suiting it by being that he was having a mid life crisis and then she mentioned the grey hair and the fact that lady did a terrible touch up.... well most would think she was overly rude and nasty with her comment but you really had to see the facial comical expressions. It made her father and I laugh and we really needed that laugh at that time. Hubby had a not so good day, and it was light humour at the right time.
Here's a layout of Taylor, doing what she does lot of == smiling at the world.

LaWanna Desjardin, Desjardin Digital Designs-Daisy Rubbons and Paper from Oopsy Daisy Kit, Swirl from Swish Stamped Botanical Stamps

How pathetic is this......

2009-07-20T21:17:00.008-05:00

Got home from work tonight and hubby mentioned he might put the sprinkler on the front lawn. So out I went to to do some weeding, and well after filling two small bags ouch, a blister. Couldn't believe it, and man does it hurt. Sad thing was I was just teasing Taylor about getting a splinter, and how much it must of hurt-NOT so sympathy from her was zero.
Anyway the lawn looks weed free, the finger is hurting and the lawn didn't get watered after all cause it's suppose to rain tomorrow.
Taylor tried to help but she spent more time flitting about and doing some karate moves when she was forced to lol by me.
Pathetic about getting a blister though, shows that I don't' do much manual labour eh.

and

Just figured out I have deleted my videos for my traditional and digital layouts, gotta work on getting those back on line, only problem is most of my other work is on the other computer so guess I'm just gonna have to kick hubby off it sometime so I can get organized.

A layout to share that's designed using a template and an amazing kit.

Kit Credit to Mad Scrapper Designs - Wendis World- Template - by Fabella and Font-Scriptina

Another Saturday

2009-07-18T21:56:00.001-05:00

Another Saturday has come and just about gone, and well here I sit after having bopped about the boards for a bit.
Another scrapbook site I frequent is closing, it's so sad to see but knowing that the owner made the decision on what is best for her family I give her credit. Family should always come first. I made the mistake with a job I had to always consider career first, and with that job having ended I've come to realize family is there for you always, and always needs you there for them. My husband is my pillar for most things in life and my daughter has become my hero. Yah, I ask myself often how an eight year old can be my hero but she is. She meets each task in life head on without hesitation. She does have fear but she never lets that stop her from a challenge. She knows her abilities, she understands in life frustrations, and she acts responsibly for all she does. My husband and I have given her her wings, she needs to choose how she will fly, and so far she has made so many right choices that I truly wish her well and luck in all her endeavours. I know she will succeed and I know that in life we have alot more to teach each other. I am truly hoping that in creating my scrapbook pages that she will always know how proud we are of her.

CREDITS: All papers and elements from In The Garden by Mad Scrapper Designs

It's been a few days

2009-07-14T20:26:00.005-05:00

some days I just can't belive it's already that day in the week. Today seems like one of those days, and just when you think you are somewhat organized life has a way of throwing you a curve ball.

First off a huge big thank you to Jan for the wonderful box of goodies that you sent. Last week Thursday, I headed to my post office to pick up the parcel I won, the Bind-it All, and inside she had put a thoughtful little gift package for Taylor, that was all held together with a cute hair scrunchie. Your thoughtfulness was so appreciated, Taylor's eyes literally shone with excitement when she opened up the little gift bag and found a mini cd album, she can't wait to put the album together with pictures she has already selected, and all the little page embellishments were so exciting for her to look through. Thanks also so much for the extra little goodies you sent to me, my list of things to do has grown and I can't wait to play with all my new items.

A little story to share: Last week I was at the grocery store picking up a few things. The gentleman ahead of me had a few groceries plus a local newspaper. When the cashier totalled his items he suggested he didn't have enough money and asked the girl to put the paper aside. Thinking about how scrapbook designers and lots of my friends are always "Paying it forward," I smiled at the cashier when she started to check out my minimal things, and asked her to include that paper in my monies owing. She did so, and when she had I handed the paper to the gentleman and said, hope you enjoy and when you can do a kind act for someone you come across. He smiled, said thankyou and went on his way, I did the same, feeling a little happier in my heart knowing that I had done something simple to make someone else smile.

I haven't been able to do alot of scrappin lately with all the things that life has pushed my way, but I can take alot of what I have learned from the kind friends I have met on the net and apply those simple lesson to make others happy.
Enjoy your scrappin and be sure to share what you can, when you can, to put a smile on both parties hearts.

Credit Fotosusu-Dancing Flowers

Can't Wait

2009-07-08T21:03:00.003-05:00

When I got home tonight hubby told me there was a note on the door that there's something for me at the postoffice and that it can be picked up tomorrow. I'm so excited I think it's the prize I won from http://papercraftpleasures.blogspot.com/. Tomorrow night can't come fast enough, how sweet was Jan she told me she removed the styrofoam and put in a little something special for Taylor as well. There really are nice people in the scrapping blog land and I truly believe Jan is one of them. Hugs Jan can't wait to see the surprise for Taylor and create with my new toy.

Oh yah and wooohooooo my siggy worked, maybe there is hope for me yet lol.